adventure, restarted, again, see also--uncertainty

 Last July, I was awaiting the paperwork to move my empty-nest life halfway around the world. There was a lot of uncertainty, but also a lot of anticipation. 

Having returned to the US suddenly and unexpectedly because of the state of world geopolitics in March, I find myself in a similar position this July, again making preparations to leave the United States, again looking at rental apartments and city maps online, gathering more documents, making new lists of what to store, what to donate, what to take. 

This time, Buttercup is not coming with me. I feel like I need to be more nimble than I was last year, and moving a pet across international borders is the opposite of nimble. So this week, we drove from Syracuse to Kalamazoo, where she will stay with my mom and revel in once again being the Only Cat in the House. She's already settling in well: 

When I left Moscow, I didn't leave my job. I've continued to teach and hold writing center consultations remotely. In the coming academic year, I'll be taking on the additional role of writing center director (with a raise! and a reduced teaching load!).

I'll be working remotely from Yerevan, the capital city of Armenia, which is fewer time zones distant from Moscow and has a reputation for excellent wine. (There are other reasons, but those aren't my news to break.) I may have the opportunity to retrieve some of the personal things I left in my apartment (on which I am still paying rent!) including all of my research library, my cello, my good winter boots. 

( I don't speak Armenian, yet. But folks my age and older, who attended primary school in the Soviet Union, tend to speak Russian in addition to Armenian, and the younger generations tend to speak English as their additional language.)

People ask if I'm excited about Yerevan, and the answer is, "sort of?" I'm so in the details and logistics, that there is little space for excitement. Also, the lesson my adult life seems to be teaching me is that when good things happen for my career, the situation falls apart--I signed a contract and had to back out because widowhood, I signed a contract and a pandemic delayed moving, I moved and had to move back. My optimism is broken. The most positivity I can muster right now is thankfulness that I still have a job. 

(I have applied for jobs in the US since I've been back, most of them at private high schools since the application cycle for English professors for AY22-23 was over by March, but all I've gotten is crickets. Many thanks to those of you who sent links to job ads my way!)

This Yerevan plan has been on my horizon for a while, but has only coalesced recently, and until last week, I was contemplating several different plans, each with complex arrangements for housing, travel, Buttercup, and remote work. A friend expressed awe at the variety of logistical contingencies I had researched and mapped out. This is a thing I have gotten *very* good at. It is also a skill I do not enjoy using.